Sunday, February 16, 2014

Day 10: The Scott Hamilton Post

This works best if you imagine it being spoken by Scott Hamilton, 1984 Olympic gold medalist and current Primetime commentator on NBC for their figure skating coverage. If you know him, this will make sense, otherwise it’s going to be really confusing!


Personal remarks will be italicized.


This is an amazing night in the Olympics. These ice dancers tonight are incredible performers. They show so much personality on the ice! I think they should have a personality score along with the component and technical scores! They all have way more personality than the individual or pairs skaters!


How about these Italian dancers? I love the music they’ve chosen! Not enough people choose music from the musical 42nd street. They went with the music and NAILED it! Incredible!


And how about that Canadian pair? Just a fantastic performance there.


The Russians though. *sigh* It wasn’t their best performance. They had their fair share of mistakes, and it showed. Their distance was far too much. It really was disappointing.


And Meryl and Charlie...wow...they just exude beauty up and down the ice. While everyone else chose big band and swing for their foxtrot routines, Meryl and Charlie go completely in the opposite direction and choose musical theater! It was a breath of fresh air from those two.


And how about these behind-the-scenes shots? Meryl and Charlie practicing! Helping with makeup! Being nervous! Tessa and Scott warming down! Stretching! Waiting! Some might call that intrusive, but I call it masterful.


I want Meryl’s dress.


And now we get into the bonus section, and she’s going to really add to her score here in the Mini Blurbs…


Lindsay Jacobellis is looking for redemption here, and here she GOOOOOES! NO! …*ugh* she even changed her hair so people would stop recognizing her as That Girl Who Blew It. It’s really too bad. She’s going to be thinking about that for a long time.


You think short track is unpredictable and crash-happy? Take a look at this! On the airplane, two different dudes in different parts of the plane audibly groaned when Jacobellis crashed. I already knew it was coming - I tuned in at 3:30 this morning!


And here comes Eva SamkoVAAAAA! WOW! What a race! She raced a pure race right there. She should be proud of herself. And the Czech Republic has their first gold of the Games!


Look at that BMW sled go down the track! Steve Holcomb really knows how to throw his weight around!


Here come the Jamaicans! It is so... beautiful... that the Jamaicans overcame all the adversity just to get here. *teary* They should feel proud. *choked up* I am so proud of them!


And LOOK AT SWEDEN GO! The Sweden men’s cross-country team just nailed their race in the 4x10km relay today! They started strong and never let down!


It’s a shame about the Norwegians. They tried so hard and couldn’t live up to the expectations.


Super G! Unbelievable! Look at those skiers GO! Off the jump, they race Through THE TUUUUUUURNS! TIE FOR BRONZE YES! UNBELIEVABLE! SILVER! AMAZING! WORDS!


And take a look at that SPEED SKATING FINAAAAAAL! Dutch sweep! WOW! For the third time this WEEK! Only one girl thought that would happen, and she’s writing this article at this very moment in time. Words cannot express the joy she’s feeling at finishing this article, which was much more difficult to produce than she thought it would be.


I can’t wait to listen to Tara Lipinski and Johnny Weir and Terry Gannon tomorrow morning.



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